Zombie Drive-by Liberty is earned through eternal vigilance

25Dec/100

Asshole day

The problem is that we currently live in upside-down land, bizarro world. The biggest criminals, doing the most heinous deeds including mass murder by war and starvation, are protected behind ah-fuck-it levels of red tape and plausible deniability. People are allowed to know that the most successful political campaigns are the well-funded ones, and then get all puffed up and surprised when the elected officials go with the interest of big business against the stated will of the people every single time they think they can get away with it. The most legal and accepted drugs are the most dangerous and profitable ones, while the most demonised and illegal ones are those with the highest risk of pulling your head from your ass.

The problem is that we celebrate one day in the year when it's the season to be jolly and nice to each other, while for all the other ones it's widely accepted that those are the days that everyone is meant to steal as much as they can from each other and be utterly miserable about it. There are enough people taking antidepressants that they're finding it in the drinking water, and all the questions of "why, why, why?" are drowned out by the loudness of "please sir, may I have some more?". Earth's most celebrated day is the birth of earth's most famous martyr, whom everyone supposedly looks up to but almost no-one listens to. It doesn't matter that the celebration is done by lining the pockets of the most usurious and gutless scum to ever walk the earth and that no one actually lives by the lessons that Jesus attempted to teach us, because it's the thought that counts. In a world of make-believe money, hard and soft, where a mental flat line is as common as Colon Cola™, thoughts are the only currency people can still believe in.

In the age where reason has returned to nature, be it tomorrow or in a thousand years, we may well spend one day instead attempting to remember the utter desolation and suffering that can be visited upon a planet when people turn "it's not my problem" into their creed. On asshole day, kids would try to duck little turds bursting from a rothschild piñata, and attempt to loop the noose around the banker, wearing a blindfold made from the precipitated catatonia of humanity. On asshole day, everyone would choke down a glass of piss and then form groups to discuss how much they enjoyed it, because that's how it was done in the old days.

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